from "memento mori" to a phoenix rising
sickness to recovery

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

sometimes i wonder if you're still alive

...how could you survive, such a dangerous world?

20 million points for getting that reference.  I am, of course, referring to my sanity.  If you've seen it, please, let me know.  Thanks.

I kind of hate myself.  88 pounds STILL.  Another plateau?  Really?  I can't take that now >.<  And I was so discouraged/sick (cold/sore throat) that I had a sorta-binge of probably 900 calories.

Why can't I get it through my stupid head that eating will just make EVERYTHING worse?

a'sldkgh;owi5vpoierunsdlkfja;l = head on keyboard.

Also, how ironic would it be if I get caught for the cutting over the anorexia first?  'Cause it's probably gonna happen :P

Hope all of your days were better than mine.

3 comments:

  1. hahah that would be ...annoying (the cutting over ana) its like you are screaming NOTICE ME i am wasting away why wont you notice me?! i know how it is >.<
    dont say you hate yourself! 88lbs is beautiful :) you'll get off the plateau!

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  2. arghh plateau's are simply the most annoying biochemical process ever >:(

    ReplyDelete
  3. Honey you know I get worried about you when you talk like this!!

    Going to nag nag nag now...
    I know you can't see it this way BUT, a plateau at 88 CAN be seen as maintaining?

    I mean, you're at a very low weight now and I'm pleased for you, but you don't seem happier my love. And cutting? Then I won't be able to take you on my skinny bitch barbados holiday (with K and others) because you'll have to hide your gorgeous bikini body under a huge kaftan.

    So think of me nagging you from afar and try keep your spirits up?

    I love you xxxx so much! xxxxx

    ReplyDelete