Well now. Here's a brain-vomit post for you lovely ladies.
First of all, Anonymous's comment on my last post made me cry. Thanks, bitch. If that's what you think, take a look at that sidebar there. Yeah, wannarexics usually weigh as much as middle schoolers when they're 17. BITCH. Here's to proving you WRONG.
Second, obviously I'm as much of a failure at health as I am at other stuff :/
Physically, my body feels great (if bloated and distended and FAT) from all the food my mother's been shoving down my throat.
Mentally, I'm a WRECK. A complete loony-bin-falling-apart wreck.
She did some research on EDs and realized that I, wow, have a problem! And that 90 is not a healthy weight! And then
(yeah, girls. She went there.)
She took the scales.
I snapped.
Screw her, screw health.
I have no idea how much I weigh, and it's terrifying. As soon as I'm home alone, I'm going to tear the house apart trying to find them.
For now, I'm taking each day as it comes. She forces me to eat, whatever. The less fuss I put up, the more she'll trust me, etc. etc. All that nonsense. I'm just gonna do my best to never gain weight.
Ever again.
Take that, world.
Posie's back.
How are all of you? I don't have time to catch up on blogs really, but I missed you girls like mad.
Missed you! Seriously, don't take Anonymous' shit to heart. You're NOT a wannarexic. And she should stuff it.
ReplyDeleteSo your scales are gone... Use this as an opportunity to test your strength without relying on machinery. Rely solely on how good YOU look, instead of how good the scale looks. But I'm sure you're already beautiful anyway :) As for your mom, just know she's doing her best to be the best mom that she can, and while it may deter your progress, it would be best for both of you to just stay civil and loving. Good luck, darling!
xo
Victoria
look on the bright side, if you do gain a lot of weight because of your mother, then you can just start whole process over again and it'll be better because you'll lose weight more quickly!
ReplyDelete