yes

i wrote the poem in the last post

love is found in bodies

in the slope of bare backs

pooled in the hollows of collarbones

curled in the curve of a hip

in the sharp angel wings

of shoulderblades

jutting above bedsheets

in the fire left

by fingertips 

traced over skin

cooled by kisses

in legs tangled together and

hands cupped on cheeks

fingers twined and 

arms wrapped around

each other.

a question

I'm working on an assignment for English class.

A poem.

And I need some inspiration, so I ask you all a question:

What does it mean to you to have an eating disorder?

things

things that i love:  the Boy, spring, sun, daffodils, grass, bare feet, the sound of a keyboard, the taste of mango, the smell of rain, the feel of velvet, painted fingernails, thigh gap, braids, scented markers.

things that i hate:  wannarexics.

etc.

hello my name is

hello my name is [name]

i am a [recovered] [recovering] [current] anorexic and self-harmer

but that is not who i am


hello my name is [name]

i am not my ED

i am not my self-harm

i am me

a picture

Here are my legs.  Last year.  During the time the scale was taken away.  So I'm guesstimating I weighed around 90 pounds.  Maybe less.  Maybe more.  The jeans are a 0.

I'm just a fatass now.  Stuck at 115 and can't seem to do a damn thing about it.  Donated those jeans.  Ha.

I hate me.

alive

just in limbo

getting rejected from uni sucks

i'm 4 out of 5 acceptances now

always failing at perfection